Jackie and the beanstalk

My hart thumps louder then a crazy party, I have just climbed the beanstalk and now I am face to face with a double headed giant. His voice screams louder then anything on planet earth. Right now I am between heaven and hell. Everything stops, all of the preposterous things flow into my mind. He will rip my head off and eat it for dinner. Well he doesn't. He locks me in a cage and starts laughing. I haven't told you my name yet, my name is Jackie, but most people call me Jack. 

One day my auntie told me to sell the house and cart. So I did. Some crazy lunatic comes and gives me some beans. He begs me for the horse, so I give it to him. Before the horse trots off. He tells me something very important. Don't get the beans wet. I just have got them wet. Wow. This monster beanstalk grows straight infornt of my eyes. Oh boy I'm in trouble. 

Me, myself and everybody in poutama.

As most of you know, I'm Aroha, the award winning bright star. Troy and Nics favourite student. Got nice smooth hair, and arms as strong as a gorillar. Actually I'm nothing like that. I'm the weird qwerkie one in the block. I always tend to embassies my self with something stupid I say or do. Today I will be telling you how I became the queen of the world. "Just tricking, yes Andy Griffins is a star. 

My life has been a bumpy road, yes very bumpy. As bumpy as a 7hour drive to Auckland. But I have enjoyed all the fun little things like camp, and the plaza, and butter chicken.

 Jade has been the most horrible person I have ever met. Always mean and nasty. Always saying I'm the one who cracks eggs in her garden. So not true. Just kidding, another one of Andy Griffins books I think. Jade is the most wonderful never wrong, and polite person in the world. Always smiling, and never giving up. Well actually that is a lie as well. The only thing I can say about Jade is she is tall, my BFF and, well Jade. 

Nic, 

He is ummm, well totally, awesome cool funny weird incredible outstanding, awesome hahahaha, lol, awesome cool funny and my teacher. Nic has been my teacher for two years. That's like 365 days twice. 

Ok bye. 

Well I have so much more to talk to you about. Georgia Anna Maia. Butter Chicken. Troy Elly ebony. Well maybe next time. Although I do have 2 minuets left.  Ok maybe Josiah can sing you his leaving song. Nah. Wait, I think mum is calling me. I better go. But remember to check out all my other bits and pieces about writing. See ya later.   

Our Time To Shine

Sweat slide down the side of my check as I hear the words come in girls. As we slide into the hall all eyes on us. The scorching sun spews into the room. Blazing straight into my eyes. The music starts and I feel puzzled. What happens  we get to the stage and the song is in the middle of its time?

It all started when mum was late. Time was passing. My hair can't make it self. Waiting out side I finally see her. I yank her out of the car and we dash into the bathroom. Sue ( Niamh's mum ) gives us our costumes. Our look is Si Fie type thing. We got half a mask and decorated it with sparkles.  Mean while mum is just doing the last bit of hair. We rush into the music room, then scurry out. My face redder then a ripe chili. Shaking like crazy I have enough courage to go out there. We get called, "all the way from the other side of the world, please welcome the dancers." We hadn't made up a name for the group yet. There were two sides.

Butterfly's ( nerve wreaking side ) or the fighters ( the confident no butterfly side. ) who's gonna win. Oh butterfly's are down fighters are up oh no fighters are down. Butterfly's win. The point of this fight is that I was super duper nervous.

We scurry on stage. Our jam plays. We haven't even gotten to our destination ( the stage.) I am so confused.  Jade jiggles her head to troy. Hesitating him. Trying to tell him to stop. Nothing. She jiggles her head again.  He stops the music. Then plays it again. I am flooded in sweat right now. Even though I am hotter then egypt we carried on with the dance, got every move correct and I was like a steam room. 







use a range of challenging verbs: Orange

• use the hot words: boiling, sizzling, searing etc.,: Green

select one or two similes: Green

select one or two metaphors or personification: Green

use onomatopoeia to show sounds: Orange

select words that start with the same sound (alliteration): Red

We had to use (See, Hear, Smell, Feel, Taste, Think, Do, Feel, Say) in parts of our story so for see you had to put so etching that you saw and you had to do that for all of the other words.

BUDDY COMMENT: I think you did well at your detail and your boiling hot words but I think you should improve on your main idea like your dance because your are not really putting that much into your story!!!
Buy Your BFF Jade


Comment: I think I was good at using a range of hot words. Mabey next time I could foucuss on using alliteration

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