Well done Aroha you have retold an excellent version of Tane and the Three Kete. I like how you experimented with vocabulary like "disagreed" and "squeaky". They really added to the story. You have really good control over your sentences, with capital letters at the beginning and full stops at the end.
Next time you should try to use commas to break up your sentences and to add more depth. For example, "He was nervous and excited at the same time, like the feeling you get before a big race"
Well done Aroha you have retold an excellent version of Tane and the Three Kete. I like how you experimented with vocabulary like "disagreed" and "squeaky". They really added to the story. You have really good control over your sentences, with capital letters at the beginning and full stops at the end.
ReplyDeleteNext time you should try to use commas to break up your sentences and to add more depth. For example, "He was nervous and excited at the same time, like the feeling you get before a big race"
Nic